I’d Rather Have A Vitz

I'd rather Have a Vitz - 10 cars more useless than a Vitz Diasporadical

For whatever reason, we’ve managed to create the illusion that we at Diasporadical have something against the Vitz. Alas, we do not. They are perfectly sound vehicles, albeit small and laughable. But nay, Vitz owners, do not fret; there is yet hope. You see, I’ve gone out on the streets of this fair city and found 10 cars that are more useless than the Toyota Vitz. And here they are in no particular order. Continue reading

Tattoos in Kenya

My Fellow Countrymen,

It seems somebody snuck a needle and some ink across the border. Now all you under-35ers are getting moist and stiff in the loins for skin doodles. A few years ago, getting piercings was a big thing, now, all of a sudden, everybody and their mothers are getting flowers and Bible verses inked in their armpits. All this randomness in the name of being hip.

And it’s cute. This whole fad is freakin’ adorable.
I’m happy for you.
I really am.

So happy in fact, that I’d like to ask a small favour, if I may? Kindly allow me to share in your joy and laugh as loudly as my lungs allow – in your face – when you show me your new tattoo. Continue reading

True Myths about the Vitz

In my opinion, the Vitz is the worst thing to happen to Kenyan women after hair weaves. And if you’re a guy that drives a Vitz, you leave a lot to be desired as eyebrows are raised regarding your sexual orientation and that of your friends who like to chill in your mots. A lot has been said about the Vitz, and from a layman’s point of view I wish to reaffirm every opinion you have heard about this little toy.

Disclaimer: Your Dream-Car Dreams End Here

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