Every time we mention Zimbabwe, it seems to be based on an individual’s ludicrous behavior. This time is no different.
Two Senators in the government there seem to have some genius solutions on how to curb their already declining HIV prevalence.
One gentleman, a Mr. Fernai, suggests that women’s attractiveness is the problem. He’s of the opinion that government should pass laws to make sure these girls are as smelly and unattractive as possible.
“What I propose is that Government should come up with a law that compels women to have their heads clean-shaven like what the Apostolic sects do. [...]They should also not bath because that is what has caused all these problems (spread of HIV),”
This guy may be on to something. All these clean women, showering once a day and all that, may just be the reason why diseases are spreading. Nobody really wants to get it on with a filthy broad, right? And just in case you still want to boink a smelly chick, he has a second part to this ‘solution’(the irony of this word will hit you later).
“Women have got more moisture in their organs as compared to men so there is need to research on how to deal with that moisture because it is conducive for bacteria breeding. There should be a way to suck out that moisture.”
Ehm. Yeah. See because the dirty ones among you immediately thought “moisture” and …well, you know, lubrication. The smart ones immediately thought ‘cesspool’. And say what you will about Mr. Rennai, but that is a very smart way to go, passing legislation to commission the development of some sort of ‘sucking’ mechanism that gets moisture out of women.
Not to be outdone, another Senator had a few thoughts and suggestions. A Mrs. Mlotshwa Matobo thinks that people are having too much damn sex. Once a month is enough. To this end, men need to get injected to reduce their libido and prisoners should be given sex toys because, gosh darn it, they need to quench those urges. Otherwise they’ll have sex and give AIDS to everyone.
Many other zany ideas were floated; from unionizing prostitutes to having workshops for the sexually active. But with this level of creativity and avant-garde strategies to find a solution to the help reduce the already reducing rate of HIV prevalence in Zimbabwe, you can almost be sure that if anyone comes up with a new way to tackle this, it’ll be our Rhodesian cousins.
Good luck to them.